For Monday: de Sousa, Chapter 4, "Reasons"

Enjoy this little break from our Shakespeare reading before we dive back into the late Sonnets after Fall Break! 

Answer TWO of the following:

Q1: In his quest to explain our reasons for falling in love, de Sousa suggests that it “is the process of perpetual change that will preserve the continuity of love” (71). How might this complicate the notion of “love at first sight,” and even the idea that we fall in love from the outside-in? Do you agree with this?

Q2: Is the concept of love itself objectifying to women? de Sousa notes that “Some feminists have disparaged love as a cruel hoax, because no single lover has the strength to overcome the tendency to ‘objectify’ women, making their desirability contingent on their playing traditional and often submissive roles” (69).  He also cites Othello's very "gender specific" reasons for falling in love with Desdemona. So is the way we think about and experience love inherently flawed? Is there a way to love as equals?

Q3: Freud suggests that many of our emotions, particularly love, have more to do with “transference” rather than choice or reason. Do you think this helps account for love at first sight? Falling in love with someone who looks/acts like your father or mother? Or are we constantly seeking to fall in love with our first love again? Could this be true for any of Shakespeare’s lovers?

Q4: When we claim that “I want to be loved for who I am,” what does this truly mean? What is your fundamental identity? And are you able to see this as clearly as someone else (considering that anyone can see your face better than you can)? As de Sousa writes, “Whose authority counts for most in deciding what is most essential about you?” (58). What if you want to be loved for your beauty, but someone else falls in love with you for your wit? Are they seeing the “wrong” you?